· What to do when we begin to eat more and people around us say we are eating a lot? ·
"I am triggered by my friend. She says she wants to go on a diet."
"I am triggered by my friends who are laughing at me for eating so much."
"I am triggered by this comment about my body. My boss said I am looking so much better now. What does she even mean? Am I looking fat?"
This is a crucial part of the journey of recovery that can be pivotal. So many beings I work with have told me this pressure had led them to a slide down relapse. 🤮
But hey ho, I also know as a fact that this could be a hurdle you pass through and emerge as a phoenix for life. 🤗
How do we stay in our own truth and stand still in the eye of the storm when our sensitivity (let alone the discomfort we are experiencing as our body begins to adjust to trusting us again) about our bodies is already so heightened during recovery?
The world around us is constantly carried out beyond our control. We can't press pause on what others say and do, but we certainly have the power to press pause on how we process and choose what/who to invite the messages from our surrounding.
We are on higher alert when we are in recovery because we are becoming more aware of the fluctuations and changes that the body is undergoing in recovery. Imagine being in this chrysalis that can make it difficult for us to see the butterfly we will become.
I remember numerous times of relapses that befell me when I was recovering from anorexia, only because I had not been equipped to deal with comments from other people around me.
If you are struggling, I want you to check in with yourself and be honest: are you doing this for the sake of someone else other than your own presence?
When we are recovering in unconsciousness, we are still stuck in a place where we are hugely judgmental of ourselves.
You may start eating, but you may still be secretly hoping to quickly lose the refeed weight; or you are putting in extra hours of workout to burn off what you ate... and then you are hungry all the time, and you think you are eating non-stop because now you have a problem with food...
Do you see how this cycle just never ends? 🤪
The truth is when you are in this state, you are not ready to let go. You are just shifting the problem from one container to another. Hello relapse!
We can be told by all the people in the world that we need to eat to get well and to get well to see the best possible chance of living a life free from fear of food and weight gain and overexercising, but if we are receiving treatment from a space where we are just going with the programme without truly committing to the vision that you would like to see on the other side of this disorder, you are still going about with a mind that feels constantly under threat. Mentally you are wired to fail. You will so easily be triggered and is it any wonder then that you fall back into old unconscious patterns?
That's why I do the work from the heart with my clients and then slowly learn to embody all of us with no judgement.
Everything begins from the self.
We cannot control anyone but we can have faith in ourselves to walk this path to freedom.
Faith ＋ Patience ＋ Non-judgement.
You can have unconditional and complete love for your entire being. Yes, you can learn to remember the Sacred Way to go home to your soul.
Perhaps a rock bottom needs to happen for you.
I firmly believe that you do not need to be on the brink of hospitalisation to get help. The system may be broken, but you are not broken.
When this feels difficult, reach out. We are never meant to do this alone. It is our own story to write, yes, but we are incredibly social beings who are meant to reach for mentorship when we need it.