In my quest to serve beings who are mired in eating disorders (anorexia, bulimia), food addictions and disordered eating, I found myself coming up with the same question again and again:
"How do you overcome the fear of weight gain?"
Well, let me take you through my own journey to full recovery after struggling for ten years with relapses.
October 2016: When I finally decided to go full on with my recovery, I allowed myself to surrender first. Now I must admit that at this stage I was terrified － terrified － of how fat I was going to become.
But here I was, and I was committed this time to do this. Once. And. For. All.
Upon surrendering I lived a year of seclusion because I was ashamed of my body, ashamed of how it bloated and held onto weight. I know now that this is my body healing in its own way, and through surrender I can fully embrace my body no matter how it looks or feels like.
This was the first realisation that released me from this self-imposed prison sentence. No longer was my day hinged upon how much I have eaten or how my body appearance is.
I love myself, my body, no matter what. It is such a simple pledge, but such a divinely guided and heart-opening one.
Since then, I have tried everything that could possibly inch me a step closer to my recovery:
〰️ Spiritual healers and teachers
〰️ Sound hea