Piece by piece they are jettisoned
Like shards from a spiralling aeroplane flying out of its silver bullet body
This identity that was built upon fashion's construction
I wonder now how girls would turn out if society had not imposed these doctrines on what to wear and how to speak.
I remember when I was an intern I was told to wear pinstripe jackets and buttoned down shirts so I could be taken seriously
And that "it is the way it is".
And then I knew that was never going to be me
So I burst out in colours
And embraced fashion's idiosyncrasies.
I used to call the industry affectionately a bunch of misfits.
We didn't use to fit in but now we have turned that awkwardness into gold.
But what was supposed to be freedom
Soon turned to shackles
In the form of towering impossible heels and judgemental eyes for names and fame.
I don't think I ever got to that point of no return.
But I certainly have moved and changed and spiralled into another dimension since.
This morning I felt the end of this renunciation.
I am embracing that past
That girl who found joy in fashion, in materialism, in beauty, in luxury, in fine things.
Because in the end, all that we exalted in that sphere are also a form of celebration of the flaws within (think mercurial photographers, anorexics, bulimic, all the disorders that came with our sometimes fatal love and infatuation for beauty).
Here with Cha Dao, we are celebrating flaws and imperfections too, only on a different plane, in a different form.
Like waves in an ocean, we are all individuals
And yet One of this Oneness.
A chajin who lives beauty.
Womxn and gxrls, if you feel suppressed and disabled from self-expressions of any sort, I want you to know that you can rise, like a Phoenix you can rise. Awaken to love through the heartbreaks and losses. Awaken to the Goddess that is YOU through the many spiritual breakthroughs. Face down those feelings of dis-ease and do not ignore them. Rather, face them with love and tenderness with all of your own heart, and never ever forget that you are a whole being, exactly where you should be. 💫